Longtime friend on this week’s episode, I met Dr. Joseph Geraci on the advisory committee through "Face the Fight" a consortium/initiative; goal to reduce Veterans' suicide by 50% in 5 years. We review the crucial support mechanisms for veterans during their vulnerable transition period into civilian life, especially focusing on preventing suicide.
…Understanding this evolving landscape is crucial in addressing men's body image issues and promoting a healthier, more inclusive perspective on masculinity and self-worth. By understanding these challenges, men’s health advocates hope to foster greater awareness, empathy, and support for men facing these issues.
In this episode, I interview Ross Sonnenblick about his doctoral research, his desire to help others, and his lived experience with body image challenges.
If you’ve watched the movie “Barbie” released this week, you may understand that Kenergy can be understood as a positive framing of masculinity, which challenges toxic portrayals of traditional male traits. The term draws inspiration from the character Ken, who plays a supportive role in his relationship with Barbie. Ken’s character stands in contrast to conventional gender norms that expect men to be dominant and stoic and to avoid embracing traits perceived as "weak."…
Masculinity has long been associated with stoicism, patriarchy, and self-reliance, but these traditional norms have proven detrimental to men's mental health. Higher rates of suicide, lower rates of help-seeking, and increased substance use and violence among men highlight the urgency for change. In his book "Man Kind: Tools for Mental Health, Well-Being, and Modernizing Masculinity," counseling psychologist Dr. Zachary Gerdes presents a transformative framework to help men foster collaboration, embrace vulnerability, and build mental resilience. By challenging outdated concepts of masculinity, Gerdes offers a path toward improved mental health and well-being for men. Societal expectations that encourage men to suppress emotions and avoid seeking help exacerbate men’s mental health challenges.
In this podcast, Dr. Gerdes covers the LIFT model of helping men modernize ideas about masculinity and live happier lives.
The research on ”Adverse Childhood Experiences” is clear — The CDC Adverse Childhood Experiences (ACE) Study has identified ten types of childhood trauma that can affect people later in life. Five types of trauma are personal, such as physical abuse or neglect, while the other five are related to family members, such as having a parent who is an alcoholic or experiencing the divorce of parents. Each type of trauma counts as one, so someone who has experienced physical abuse, has one alcoholic parent, and a mother who was a survivor of domestic violence has an ACE score of three.
The study revealed a strong link between childhood trauma and chronic diseases that people develop as adults, such as heart disease, lung cancer, and diabetes. It also showed a link to social and emotional problems such as depression, violence, and suicide.
9 our of 10 employers are investing more in mental health benefits than they ever have before (source: https://www.aihr.com/blog/workplace-wellness-trends/).
Concerns about burnout, employee churn, and psychological emergencies have led workplaces to developing a more comprehensive and proactive mental health and suicide prevention strategy.
Benefits like coaching, tele-mental health, personalized wellness plans and stress management tools are becoming increasingly popular for large employers.
In addition, workplaces are starting to shift away from reactive, downstream approaches to more proactive prevention. They are focusing on building caring cultures and psychological safety and they are connecting the dots between DEI (Diversity, Equity and Inclusion) work and mental health.
In this conversation, I speak with Mike Veny, a man who has been living these connections and is now training workplaces on how best to support their workers.
Mental health providers — often well-intended and fearful — have made suicide prevention complicated. “Clipboard counseling,” interrogation approaches and highly restrictive interventions have not worked. What if a 5-step, 30-minute intervention made a huge difference? What if we could train peers to help with firearm safety counseling? In this interview I speak with Veteran and psychologist Dr. Craig Bryan about his evidence-based “Crisis Response Planning” intervention…
In this conversation I speak with Kate Eckman, an elite college athlete, broadcast journalist and TV personality and recent author of “The Full Spirit Workout: A Ten-Step System to Shed Your Self-Doubt, Strengthen Your Spiritual Core, and Create a Fun and Fulfilling Life.” We talk about the neuroscience behind our understanding of well-being — and what gets in our way of achieving and maintaining well-being. We discuss the curious versus the anxious brain and the learning versus the judging brain. We explore the questions of “when is enough, enough?” and “who do we really want to be?” We close with specific strategies on how to tip the scales from immobilizing fear to the ability to “stretch the comfort zone” and “build the emotional muscles.”
There is a growing scientific field called “ecotherapy” that has demonstrated a strong connection between time spent outside in nature and improved well-being. Shifting our attention to the sounds, smells, and beauty is calming for many. On brain scans we can actually see reduced activity in. the parts of the brain that are linked to rumination — or repetitive negative thoughts. In this episode, I speak with Sebastian Slovin, author of Experience Nature Unplugged: A Guide to Wellness in the Digital Age, a new book on how connecting with nature helps reset our brains. We discuss the ways our digital lives are negatively impacting our mental health and how nature is the perfect antidote.
When it comes to overcoming mental and emotional challenges, we have a problem. In fact, according to Cope Notes we have several:
PROVIDERS: Our mental health providers are often overwhelmed with demand, that accessing services in a timely way can be challenging. Once we find an available provider, we often can’t afford the level of service we need, and, even if we can, we find that many providers are not culturally or linguistically aligned with the people who need the support the most. Medicalization, jargon and pathologizing can keep us in a mindset of “sickness.”
PEOPLE IN NEED: In many instances the process of finding the right services is overwhelming, confusing, and exhausting. This level of perseverance is difficult for people who are functioning well, let alone for people who are feeling hopeless, unseen and unknown. Once people do find their way to support services, they often worry about privacy, judgment, and losing control.
COMMUNITIES: Generally speaking we seem to be focused more on responding to crises than we are on preventing them in the first place. Our approaches, therefore are reactive instead of proactive and big splashes of effort instead of slow drips over time.
In this conversation I speak with the brilliant and inspiring Johnny Crowder. We talk about how we can gain the upper hand on our complex and mysterious brains by short-circuiting negative thoughts. We explore how faith, creativity and community helps us gain new perspectives and forms of expression. We discuss the questions of how do we replace old thought patterns with healthier ones? How do we build a better brain? Stronger friendships and families? More resilient communities?
Transformational leadership happens when people come together to rise for a daunting challenge to benefit the common good. Transformation leaders focus on impact and empower others to reach for higher and higher levels of motivation and morality. Transformational leaders are:
Bold
Idealized influencers
Creativity encouragers
Role models for a compelling vision
Process challengers
Purpose AND people driven
Today’s podcast is about transformational leadership in the area of construction suicide prevention. I interview Jerry Shupe, the Corporate Director of Safety and Health for Hensel Phelps, one of the nation’s largest construction contractors.
“Falling in love is easy. Falling in love with the same person repeatedly is extraordinary.”
Every so once in a while, many of us in long-term relationships find we need to reboot our relationship — routines may have made relationships go stale and perpetual conflicts breed resentment. In this episode I speak with Marriage and Family Counselor Lisa Stull, an expert in the Gottman method of relationship transformation. She shares what differentiates “master couples” from “disaster couples,” teaches about the four horseman and their antidotes, and gives us tools on how to build a sound relationship house.
When we face adversity or toxic environments, how we respond makes all the difference. Breathing helps us create space in between the stimulus and our response, and in that space we can sometimes find calm, gratitude and possibilities. In this podcast I chat with Reggie Hubbard, a man who found yoga as he tried to cope with workplace toxicity and transition. His three criteria for finding tools too help him cope:
Does it enhance creativity?
Does it lower my blood pressure?
Does it make me smile?
When we ask “What do you do?”, what we often mean is “What WORK do you do?” In many ways — at least in the United States — our culture tells us, “You ARE what you do for a living.” Not only as a provider for your family and a meaningful contributor to society (and “meaningful” is often defined by the paycheck and the status") but as someone who is earnestly chasing the “American Dream.”…
On the positive side, when work is working well, it gives us a sense of belonging and a sense of being a part of something larger than ourselves. Work gives us structure to our lives and the satisfaction that our skills and talents are contributing to the world in some way. This positive aspect of our identity protects us against depression, anxiety and loneliness. In this interview with Scott Mason, we explore the role of our work in our identity and well-being. We argue that we all need to cultivate a multifaceted identity where our personal worth is based on being loved for who you ARE not just on being admired for what you DO.
Community activism is built on a cycle of trust, undergirded by stories. Synergy is achieved by weaving together purpose-driven and authentic voices that together represent a community as a whole. When the collection of stories is shared publicly, the advocates have an easier time enrolling others into the movement. When people listen to stories, communities are formed and pull together. Shared experiences become a profound source of validation and consolidation of learning. We are co-constructed by relationships in the community and the stories that arise as a result.
It is no wonder, then, that a number of collective storytelling initiatives about suicide prevention and mental health promotion have emerged, including “This is My Brave.” In this interview I interview Jennifer Marshall, founder of this nonprofit storytelling organization.
Mass incarceration, police brutality, and systemic racism are just some of the trauma and injustice many Black men face every day. In this podcast I have a difficult conversation during a heavy time with former NFL player Dwight Hollier about his story of living through tough times, how many benefit from the positive psychology of sport, and the four pillars of strength needed for total wellness.
There are many stories we tell that hold men back from living their best lives. Here are a few that create barriers for men to reach out when they are distressed (Solomon):
“No sissy stuff” — in other words, if it is what women do, then it’s not for “real men.”
“Be a big wheel” — you are what you do for a living; achievement and your paycheck define your worth.
“Sturdy oak” — you are the one people lean on for help; you don’t lean on others.
“Give ‘em hell” — when all else fails, come out swinging; better to intimidate than to look weak.
In this episode, I speak with the internationally acclaimed “fact checking” journalist Josh Levs who has been busting myths about fatherhood for years. We examine the faulty scripts, how they contribute to the suffering of families, and we challenge listeners to adopt a new mindset on developing an “All In Life.”
When we are in crisis we find ourselves constantly drained by the urgent and important things in our life that demand our attention. Should we get a moment of reprieve, we often succumb to the desire to escape by engaging in something that numbs us out. In this podcast we talk about making time for spiritual wellness during difficult times. My guest, suicide prevention specialist and community trauma responder Sarah Gaer, gives us some concrete ideas on how we can tend to our souls when our world seems like it’s falling down around us.
“Never trust a man who doesn’t drink,” John Wayne
From the Rat Pack to Animal House to Ernest Hemingway to John Wayne, many cultural icons of masculinity have glamorized the idea that booze puts hair on your chest.
Traditional American messages of masculinity teach boys to be lone wolves and to stuff down emotions. Feelings (except anger) then become taboo. This messaging creates a problem for boys and men who feel fear, grief, shame and more and don’t have role models on how to express these emotions openly. Instead, men often learn to take action when feeling these feelings by numbing emotions or distracting themselves with many forms of addictive behavior.
Traditional norms of masculinity also endorse ideals of self-control. Thus, despite high levels of substance use triggered by conflict, pain, and uncomfortable feelings, many men believe they can control their substance use well past the point of significant consequences in relationships, work and health. Because of this, they often wait until their use is causing catastrophic outcomes before they reach out to, or more typically accept others’ help.
Add to this dynamic the need for young people to experience “coming of age” rituals to make a shift from child to adult. For many young men and teens risky behavior around substances often fit the bill. Competition, fearlessness and invulnerability fuel increasingly dangerous pathways to addiction, especially for young adults who are genetically predisposed to have vulnerability to substance use disorders. In this podcast Rourke Weaver and I talk about how cultures of masculinity can fuel problems in addiction — and how they can also be leveraged powerfully when groups of men come together in recovery.
In this podcast I sit down with Cameron Stout, a securities defense lawyer who is boldly being “vocal, visible and visionary” in his industry by sharing his journey through and resilient recovery from depression and alcoholism. Attorneys are often type A professionals who are driven to succeed, yet often are reluctant to express vulnerability and share personal challenges. By speaking publicly about his recovery from major depression in 2013, and describing his seven years of sobriety, Cam reduces stigma, and helps others find the courage to be open. In addition to telling his story, Cam outlines the therapies, treatment, and wellness practices that have been key in his recovery process. As Cam will describe for us, his mission of being a storyteller has also been a large part of his own healing, as it can be for all of us.
